assume the dealer has a ten


As if the paucity of quality posts from yours truly hasn’t been obvious, I was going to take this holiday period off from blogging so’s I can get across the country and actually fall asleep in various motels, rather than try and furiously connect over a shitty landline to Earthlink’s multitudinous numbers. I have documented several of my other such trips, and frankly, that’s a lot of effort (and a lot of pictures of America’s worst toilets).

But I just have to say I’m in New Orleans again tonight, and wandered through some sketchy neighborhoods over to Harrah’s, site of some of the most fun we had at my bachelor party – although I lost more than $150 in less than ten minutes that sweltering July night.

Tonight, I walked in the door with two objectives: I would spend no more than $100 and leave with my dignity intact. First off, at the $15 Blackjack table, I had a series of very lucky hands (hitting at 14 and getting a 7, etc.) and accidentally won $100 in about 15 minutes. This seemed like a nice round figure, so I walked away, and on to the video poker, which is my semi-addiction, even on the Mac.

I put in $20, and on my seventh hand, I drew four tens. That’s right, the much-coveted 4 of a kind. Not expecting to win anything, I began to get nervous when the credits started piling into the stratosphere. Instantly, I cashed out, still not knowing how much I had (you only get a slip of paper, and I didn’t look).

I handed the cashier both the chips and the slot of paper, and she gave me back $587. Five hundred and eighty-seven dollars. I have never won a DIME while gambling, and in 45 minutes, I have paid for this road trip.

And the weird thing? We always joke about it, that little mantra you say before you roll the dice, but I think my little peanut is bringing me good luck. Things are going my way because it turns out that baby actually does need shoes.

0 thoughts on “assume the dealer has a ten

  1. Dave

    The only thing I ever wanted to play while in a casino was craps… but I am obviously not smart enough to figure out what the hell is going on there.

  2. WindRider95

    Way to go, Ian!!!!!
    I’m glad you’re winning…goodness knows I’ve left my share of contributions in The Big Easy. Although I love eating at Commander’s Palace…I’ve found that some of the real dives have the best food…enjoy yourself!!!!

  3. chip

    I, for one, have noted the decline in the quality of your posts. And I am here to register my disgust on the Internet.
    I don’t care if it’s free…..entertain me, dammit.

  4. Ian

    Hilary – that’s a good idea. But we’re buying baby shoes first.
    Chip, I assume your wedding will provide enough hilarity and scandal to make my blog good again.

  5. SALEM

    Didn’t we come up with a substitute/timesaving ritual to replace casinos after the bachelor party? I think it was to alternate punching each other in the nose and tossing $100.00 bills out the sunroof.


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