coolidge liked the vaseline

3/17/09

Great turnout, folks – at this rate, we’ll have to have second and third place prizes, so if you want to be in the NCAA tournament pool, keep leaving your comments here (with a real address in the “email” field) and you’ll get the invite. Do it by midnight tonight, please!

In the meantime, your random bits of conversation have reminded me of some bizarre, irrelevant factoids that I can’t seem to forget. I’ll give you my top three, and if you have any, please share ’em, wontchya?

1. Opening your refrigerator door costs 35 cents in energy. Maybe that’s back with older fridges, but it could really weigh on your conscience when you’re looking for Miracle Whip

2. The moon is moving 1 1/2 inches away from us every year, and that makes me sad

3. In Manhattan, you are never more than nine feet from a rat

0 thoughts on “coolidge liked the vaseline

  1. LFMDFACEBOOKHELL

    Here is a factoid for you. . . I don’t know how to use Facebook!
    Apparently I have sent friend requests to folks around the country with similar names to the ones I am actually looking for. . . I have been getting responses of “WHO ARE YOU?” and “I DON’T KNOW YOU!” and it makes me sad. I am glad that I have found some of you and would like to friend everyone on xtcian (if I knew what I was doing)! I am working off of first names and/or initials, and it is not going well.
    Due to the fact that I may never actually FIND you. . . if you’d like to find me, you can find me under: Laurie . . .Winkler . . .(last name rhymes with turtle). I promise to send only friendly messages back!

    Reply
  2. emma

    I have my bracket to enter but can’t remember my ESPN password and they seem to be slow to email me password. It is driving me nuts. I tried to create a new account and then they told me I already had an account. Good thing I started this in the morning. Might give me time to get this entry in by midnight.
    Oh, here is a factoid and he is going to hate the attention: the Gribster got engaged a couple of weeks ago!

    Reply
  3. Greg T.

    These are actual lines from a role I played in high school:
    She was fading fast, but I managed to get it in, in time.
    “The manifestation of the universe as a complex idea unto itself as opposed to being in or outside the true Being of itself is inherently a conceptual nothingness or Nothingness in relation to any abstract form of existing or to exist or having existed in perpetuity and not subject to laws of physicality or motion or ideas relating to non-matter or the lack of objective Being or subjective otherness.”
    It was a subtle concept but I think she understood before she died.
    – from “Mr. Big” by Woody Allen

    Reply
  4. kent

    In Iowa City, you’re never more than 100 yards from a lesbian. Wait, that sounds like I’m comparing lesbians to rats, which I would never do, some of my best friends are lesbians…
    Err, I’ll get my coat …

    Reply
  5. Ian

    Oh my god, Ben! I just realized THE SAME THING two weeks ago in front of Tessa – she can vouch for me!
    Honey, isn’t that bizarre?
    CM, very nice.

    Reply
  6. Rebecca

    I drove around with a dead bird in the grill of my minivan for a week. I kept smelling a dead animal in the garage, and thought a mouse or lizard was in there, but I couldn’t find it! Then last night at baseball practice I saw it. Poor thing, I remember hitting it. Let me tell you, that will get a bunch of 9 year old boys excited! It was hilarious.

    Reply
  7. Anne

    I was in my 30s when I realized that “misled” is pronounced MISS LEDD and not “MIZE-LD”. 8-/ And until just now I had never made the Chips/Ships Ahoy connection.
    *ashamed to call myself an editor now…*

    Reply
  8. Anne

    PS to Rebecca: I feel your pain! I *watched* a large bird fly up from the pavement and into the grill of my small SUV on the highway as I drove 65 mph to work. Due to traffic issues, I couldn’t pull off for several exits. Then, the poor dead creature was jammed so far into the grill, I had to find a plastic grocery bag to put over my hand (fortunately the litter quotient in the area was high) and grab the body and *pull* to get it out.
    I was crying and shaking! My 16 yo son riding shotgun: “Eeww, Mom, I can’t believe you touched that thing.”

    Reply
  9. kate

    I’ll do three:
    1. All polar bears are left-handed.
    2. An average pair of feet will sweat about a pint of perspiration a day. (Gross!)
    3. There are 336 dimples on a regulation golf ball.

    Reply
  10. Summer

    “Factoid” is a word Norman Mailer invented in his biography of Marilyn Monroe. It means something taken as fact because it appeared in a newspaper or magazine. Not an actual fact, but “like a fact.”

    Reply
  11. caveman

    put me in coach…..I’m ready to play
    stop thinking about the Heels and get to work….stop thinking about the Heels and get to work….stop think-GOD I LOVE YOU TYLER HANSBROUGH!!!!!!
    pardon

    Reply
  12. Suzanne

    Anna: Knock knock Mom!
    Suzanne (mom): Who’s there?
    Anna: Ray.
    Suzanne: Ray who?
    Anna: ray of sunshine!
    Suzanne: LOL!
    Anna: Knock Knock Mom!
    Suzanne: Who’s there?
    Anna: Ray…

    Reply
  13. Baps

    Every pet hamster is descended from a single female wild golden hamster found with a litter of 12 young in Syria in 1930.

    Reply
  14. dean

    1. You’re never more than 9 feet away from a homosexual while walking through the dook basketball team’s locker room.

    Reply
  15. Adrienne

    Knock Knock.
    Who’s there?
    Smell Mop.
    Smell Mop Who?
    Ewww, I don’t wanna smell your poo!!!
    Try it on a 6 year-old. Guaranteed to get cackles of laughter.

    Reply
  16. Jennifer M

    Homework destroys family time and sucks the fun out of the evening. I hate homework more as a parent than I ever hated it as a child.

    Reply
  17. Lindsay

    1) People who assume that all their friends who might like to be in a pool with them read their blog get grief for months.
    2) You kinda do look like a lion.
    3) Never forget: Thank you, chair.

    Reply

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