I would like credit for something. Yes, this makes me a whiny affirmation vampire with unresolved mommy issues and bizarrely unappealing narcissistic tendencies, but it also makes me write this blog, so CONSIDER YOURSELF LUCKY, readers! Anyway, I’d like to share with you an email I wrote to Tessa last month:
On Mar 4, 2009, at 4:32 PM, Ian Williams wrote:
Perhaps if I wear the Oktoberfest Bar Wench costume and YOU wear the Boba Fett space tights, we wouldn’t end up getting tangled on th-
OOPS. Disregard that. I meant to share THIS email instead:
On Mar 7, 2009, at 11:11 PM, Ian Williams wrote:
I think we should talk about buying some stocks. I’m feeling bullish. I figure it’s like this: if you believe America is done, then we’ve got bigger problems and money won’t be worth anything and we’ll grow corn and pumpkins… but if you figure we will rebound as we have done every time since the 1780s, then anyone who buys around now will be pleased with themselves…
I have spoken.
Now, fair readers, I would like to show you a graph:
Yes, yes, yes, I realize that this is still a very small slice of time, and the Dow could fall off a cliff today, and a fuckin’ meteor could crash into Six Flags Over Georgia, but if you’d listened to me and had some nads, you’d be up a LOT.
Consider at the time – March 7 – there were irresponsibly inane articles like this bandying words like “apocalypse” about, written by hand-wringers with little sense of what the word really means. I decided I was really sick of people whacking off to their End Times Porn, and wanted to call their bluff: either America is over, or it isn’t.
And if it isn’t, then parts of it are going fairly cheap right now. I say this knowing full well we’re probably not out of the economic doghouse by any means, and believe me, I still know how to grow and can vegetables if I goddamn have to.
But never underestimate the oft-overlooked power of anger and boredom – because once America gets bored and angry with the doomsayers of the economy, it means America is no longer in the grips of madness. It will start trading its fight-or-flight hormones for some rational discourse and the entrepreneurial fancy of The Big Idea.