schlub vs. heroine, round 74


I’m sorry to call upon you, my faithful blog audience, to do so much of the heavy lifting for me, but I’m fighting some kind of sleep deprivation and need to do a another CODE WORD question for today.

While not half as fun, you may be anonymous if you wish with this one… it has been my experience that couples don’t have a hundred different disagreements, they have one basic disagreement that manifests itself a hundred ways. I’m sure you can find these sentiments echoed in the Make Your Marriage Last non-fiction self-help book of your choice, so it’s not like I’m going to win the Pulitzer with this observation, but if you are in a relationship, what do you think your basic “fight” is always about?

Tessa and I get along wonderfully famously, and have done a lot of the work necessary not to find ourselves in many pickles, but back when we were young’uns, our basic argument was this: she tended to overfunction, and I underfunctioned as a result. While it still happens from time to time these days, that sort of thing continues to inch its way towards balance.

And what would you say? Distilled to its basic form, what are your arguments basically about?