survey SAYS



Do y’all remember the final “fast money” round on “Family Feud”? Richard Dawson would drag one of the family members to the front of the stage, the camera would pull in tight, and they’d get five survey questions to answer in 15 seconds. You know the drill:

“Name something you keep in a glove compartment.”

“Which month does a pregnant woman start showing?”

“Name a popular kind of pie.”

Say you’re playing it right now, and must answer the following five questions with about the same speed as a Feud contestant. Don’t worry if you repeat someone else’s answer. Go!

1. Name something besides caffeine to wake yourself up midday.

2. Worst-sounding sexually-transmitted disease.

3. Name a profoundly boring color.

4. Name something you don’t want your significant other to find.

5. A rude nickname for breasts.


0 thoughts on “survey SAYS

  1. Meredith

    1. sex
    2. crabs
    3. sand
    4. porn preference
    5. gallon sized ziploc bags filled with mushroom soup (30 Rock, thanks)

  2. Just Andrew

    Husker Du
    Gonnorhea (I had the same answer as Julie and also don’t know how to spell it, so I’m just copying her spelling of it)
    the humidor
    dairy pillows

  3. Greg T.

    Note: I also didn’t know how to spell Gonorrhea – my browser’s spell check led the way. Evidently Chrome is familiar with STDs.

  4. anon

    So funny that everyone’s misspelling venereal diseases. The site has spellcheck! Do you think we’ll think you’ve never had one if you can’t spell it? And by the way, chlamydia is a really pretty word. Genital warts sounds scary to me.
    I’ve always found “rack” offensive. I think people on Jerry Springer would use that word.

  5. noj

    1. Name something besides caffeine to wake yourself up midday.
    Red Bull
    2. Worst-sounding sexually-transmitted disease.
    3. Name a profoundly boring color.
    4. Name something you don’t want your significant other to find.
    I won’t say here
    5. A rude nickname for breasts.

  6. Scott

    Minor observations from these responses:
    1) About a third of the responses to the first question are food or drink that contain caffeine. Apparently most of us read the word “caffeine” in the question and then assume Ian meant “coffee”. I think this is really fascinating since it has happened 8 times.
    2) The responses about porn or infidelity being the item that folks would want to remain secret are not that surprising – but Meredith’s response “porn preference” is just fantastic! It’s not the porn that she wants to remain hidden, it’s the preference or specific type of porn. That, to me, is a writer’s rabbit hole waiting for someone to explore it.
    3) Still looking for the site’s spell-checker.

  7. Greg T.

    Anon – spell check is a feature of your browser – not the site. Whether you see the red line depends upon what browser you use and what features are turned on.

  8. Grover Cleveland

    It makes me sad that so many people don’t want their partners discovering or sharing their explorations of sexual fantasy.

  9. Piglet

    CENT ONE: It’s not sharing sexual fantasies with each other, so much as the discovery/admission that one has been imagining doing it with people other than one’s SO, especially when the images involve significantly different body types, maybe even a different gender.
    CENT TWO: Some of us who played along with the TV before have conditioned ourselves to say, not what is necessarily true for us, but what we think will get the most points from the 100-people survey. People hiding their porn stash is such a cliche that people who don’t even have any porn might think of it quickly. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
    My family used to play the home game, and my mom was terrible at it, even though she was clever. Ask “Name something people buy by the pound”, and she’d say “flesh”, which is cute but gets no points.


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