Lucy has been telling everyone I’m going to the South Pole. I mean, South Carolina, South Pole, who’s keeping track?
seen today en route from LAX to Myrtle Beach, SC:
• girl in security line wearing a cotton skirt that went down to her calves, then gathered into separate cuffs for each leg. Culottes? Potato sack race? Terry-cloth parachute? Not sure, but it was a dusty rose color, and she was very pretty, which made it all quite confusing.
• goth rocker in security line, who was 6’5″ until he took his platform glam boots, and then he was barely six feet tall. He had a guitar strapped to his back, and his glam boots had eight giant buckles each. He was very sweet, one of those “I didn’t find music, music found me” kind of gentlemen with almost vitiligous, alabaster pale skin. Ten minutes after I was out of the line, he was still taking one of his boots off.
• a generously obese woman with nice eyes sat behind me and told her neighbor, “I used to work at Walmart, but then someone approached me about being a plus-size model, and now… on a good day of modeling, I make four weeks’ worth of workin’ at Walmart.”
• small plane from Atlanta to Myrtle Beach seemed to use its last ten rows for “fear of flying” exposure therapy. The woman behind me hadn’t flown in two years and had restless leg syndrome (into the back of my chair) and the woman behind her hadn’t flown in 14 years (and was by far the most calm). The flight attendants knew about all of them, and was amazing. I felt blessed to have extincted that process in myself.
• draconian rules about liquids and Ziploc bags have forced passengers to load most of the their toiletries into their checked bags, or worse yet, forced passengers to check bags. This has coincided with the airline industry’s new draconian fees for checking baggage. (insert fuming mad emoticon here)
• golf has been ravaged by the recession, as you might have guessed. Nice resorts handing out deals in desperation, and you can have any tee time you’d like. Finally, plebes like me and Sean can play Davis Love III’s course!